Wanderlust

.. But like a full abandonment

Have you ever just wanted to up sticks.

Move to another country to completely immerse yourself in their language and culture

But its just a thought, a whim. right?

Or like me its a urge, a calling that you have to stifle like a yawn, hiccup, cough, sneeze.

But that stifling is getting so hard you are going to burst. scream out,

You cant suppress it well anymore. Like the rise of a panic attack

Or when someone tickles you to the point of explosion and you cant help but let out a yelp or call, your body cant contain the urge

Or years it was a pipe dream, a retirement plan maybe. But since a near death experience in 2022 I have been thinking about what my life is.

Its work to pay bills (barely due to soaring costs) and sleep.

Its existing not living. And yes there are lovely wonderful moments alone, with the cats, with friends and family but they are starting to feel empty.

I see programmes about the places and cultures and lifestyle that attune with me yet I cannot fulfil them living hand t mouth in the UK. I tried veganism and eco awareness for years and it was great but hard to sustain with costs rising and climate change in our face with seemingly no government support.

I wanted to go and life and work with these people with wholesome, healthy Eco friendly sustainable lives. Learning about how to create and manage your own little garden of herbs, fruit, veg. recycle and reuse as much as you can, solar use, composting. a full on proper hippy vegan Eco warrior!

I live in the suburbs and not a particularity nice Eco focused one.

I started learning a new language to match my love of Scandi TV dramas,to the extend of gaining a diploma in it. It reminds me of when I lived in Canada. the scenery is breathtaking.

But my pipe dream is pressing on me.

A Vacation should temper it and bring reality to the forefront.

I hope